i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
My Higher Power is John Stamos
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
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