Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Randomize
