At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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