Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Randomize