The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
