I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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