Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
