Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize