if you like me you must not know who I am
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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