hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Randomize
