I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I don't think brook has ever known best
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
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