She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Randomize
