I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
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