We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
