He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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