You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Randomize
