he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize