I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
