mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
