actually, I'm a sock model
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Randomize
