If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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