ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
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