kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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