he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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