My hair reeks of homosexuality.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
We had sex on a dog bed..
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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