is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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