the new term for farting is butt boxing.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
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