I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
