You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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