Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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