Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Dude my mom stole all your condoms
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
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