How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
