Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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