ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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