woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
