You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
