ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
he was CRYING into my vagina
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
I need moral support for this bender
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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