escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
you never un-have a 4some
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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