i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Randomize
