She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Randomize
