Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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