I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
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