So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
