It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
tell me about the fingering
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