Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
