i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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