we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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