lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Randomize
