Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
