We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize